Lauren Shamani

1. I studied a BA Honors in Photography for 3 years between 2009-2011 - during this time I decided I wanted to be a Fine Art Photographer & Creative Director, but there was something missing from my life - a sense of self, identity, a story and a journey back into the past to explore my other passions/interests/gifts other than the arts. Because of this lack of self/centre as an Artist, I was scattered, I didn't really know what I wanted back then, what message or story I wanted to tell, what my purpose was for it all so I stepped away from it all - I feel I was too young to experience so much exposure and pressures... like forcing a flower to bloom when it's not time yet. On top of this I had a couple of traumatic experiences around standing in my power as a young artist, I had my boundaries violated during work-experiences and many of my work stolen... along with being pushed and pressured into a corporate photography career that I didnt want... this all really put me off & over time the spark went out and I abandoned this dream to discover other facets of myself.

2. Between 2017-2019 I occasionally experimented (on and off) and offered women's portrait photography sessions. My intention was to create a container for women to join me in on this exploration through creative self expression and nature-body connection, holding a gentle space for them to give form and voice to their own wild essence and soul stories. It would be great to start/continue this offering again in the future but will see..

3. I am currently setting up a little business to support women and folks as a Menstruality/Cyclical Living Mentor & Psycho-Spiritual Guide. The latter was the natural evolution and outcome of having spent the last 8 years of my life deeply immersing myself into the physiology, psychology and spirituality of what it means to be a holistic women and/or cyclical human being in the 21st century. When I’m not working I continue to be a student and I am currently deepening my personal practice and professional training in somatic ecotherapy.

4. I have felt a deep urge/desire/call to return back to photography... but I have lost many of the skills required that I learned at university those many years ago + with the advancement/evolution of technology - everything has changed anyways and I haven't been able to keep up. I am returning but feel that I am starting from zero again. Because of this I have lost my confidence/self-esteem but being creative brings me such joy... I really miss it and need it back in my life again. I also now know who I am much better than I did 10 years ago I was completing my degree in Photography - I know what stories I want to tell, what themes I want to focus on and what styles I'd like to develop. It feels like I have come back full circle, perhaps, nevertheless it feels overwhelming to start from scratch again and I get anxious thinking about where to begin. I would really like to get back into a practice for myself first because always the projects I come up with are to be of service to others - which I love doing but I need to bring some balance so that I can provide an outlet to my own expression, stories and ways of looking at the world.