My project for course: Playwriting for Children’s Theater

THE WIND IN THE WILLOWS

By Kenneth Grahame, adapted by Piers Torday

(MOLE has lost his home to WEASELS and only has one picture and statue to his name. Alone and homeless, he tries to sleep by the riverbank…)

Act 1, Scene 1: THE RIVERBANK

MOLE is on the river bank with his few remaining possessions.

RAT steals on. A cycle courier with a helmet and bright livery, she is a cheeky chancer. Spying the sleeping MOLE, she tries to lift his picture and statue without waking him, but -

MOLE: Hey!
RAT: Oh.. are these yours, guvnor?
MOLE: That is my beloved Grandmother Mole, and that is my beautiful cousin, Molerina, the Ballerina.
RAT: (studying them) I can see the family resemblance now you mention it.
MOLE: They are all I have left in the world.
RAT: Give over! (hands them back) Probably only worth a few quid.
MOLE: They are priceless to me. I am all alone.
RAT: Do you have a name, Mr All Alone?
MOLE: Everyone calls me Mole.
RAT: Everyone calls me Rat - or Ratty to me mates. (They shake paws.) What brings you here then, Mole?
MOLE: I have lost my home.
RAT: Blimey! We can’t have that.
MOLE: They’ve dug it up to make a private road.
RAT: Are you having a laugh? For who?
MOLE: Weasels. The Chief Weasel.
RAT: I knew it! Weasels are the worst. Here, this’ll put a smile on your face.
MOLE: I doubt it, unless it’s a new home.
RAT: Even better than that..

She gives a loud rat whistle, and a lifeboat drifts on, marked :
PROPERTY: HMS BELFAST, DO NOT STEAL, ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A RAT
 
MOLE: Oh, Ratty. It’s so very fine! (Pause) What is it?
RAT: A boat.
MOLE: Bless my soul, of course. How silly of me. A boat! Of course (wonder) A boat.
RAT: You don’t know what a boat is, do you?
MOLE: I told you, I live underground.
RAT: Well step lively then, and I’ll show you!

RAT leaps into the boat.

MOLE: I’d rather stay exactly where I am, thank you very much.
RAT: Don’t be daft. Come on in, it’s lovely!
MOLE: It doesn’t look safe.
RAT: Doesn’t look safe? It’s a boat, not an unexploded bomb!
MOLE: Don’t they find those in rivers? Oh dear! Have you done a proper health and safety risk assessment?
RAT: Have I done a - (sighs) Yes. Go on then. I have.
MOLE: And what does it say?
RAT: It says there is a very serious risk to the health of your snout from my left paw if you don’t get in this boat right now!

RAT yanks MOLE into the boat, and they wobble, nearly falling in. MOLE sits gingerly down. RAT starts rowing, and the boat makes its way gently across the stage.